Rest of the World Singlespeed Champs 2009

Otherwise known as the New Zealand Singlespeed Champs, the "Rest of the World" SS Champs was held in Rotorua over ANZAC weekend. I wasn't sure that I would make it, because of a busy few weeks with minor illness, other events, and family commitments. But, lucky for me I got to go over on Saturday for the race (I missed the movie night (and booze-up) on Friday and the big breakfast (and booze-up) on Sunday). I failed in the costume department - time, motivation, and inspiration were all against me.
My trusty Haro Mary SS was all set to go, but I gave her a cleanup and once-over anyway, and I adjusted the brakes to get more stopping power. I left home just after 9am and headed off to Cambridge to pick up Steve. We got to the Pig & Whitsle Event HQ in good time and scored an un-metered carpark across the road. I mingled, registered, mingled, and then took mary to scrutineering. Scrutineering? What, exactly, are they going to look for on a singlespeed? Gears. Anyone running a flip-flop hub was threatenend with having the spare sproket's teeth bashed over with a hammer! The scrutineer paid special attention to my hip flask in its holder on my bike, then applied a yellow dot of approval to my number plate.

Hip flask and holder

Getting the yellow dot of approval

Cool, ready to roll. We rode out to the forest from town... taking in the scenic route around Sulphur Point and avoiding the roads - very nice. A rendezvous at the gate on Long Mile Road, then we rode en masse through the forest. I felt very slow on the first hill and got rather concerned about what was in store later on in the race - would I actually be able to ride the course if I was having this much trouble on a gradual climb up a gravel road? Our stop-start tiki-tour through the forest ended at 8 Mile Gate Road, where Race HQ had been established.

Race HQ

Our bikes were placed upside-down on their seat and handlebars along the side of the road. Tradition dictates a Le Mans start, so we walked off up the road "to a position just out of sight of the bikes" said the organiser, Dean. That's because tradition also dictates that competitors’ bikes will be moved and/or hidden. So when we came running (jogging, shuffling, walking) back down the road at the start of the race, chaos ensued as everyone scrambled to find their bikes. Some people took off on the wrong bike, others wandered around looking and not realising their bike was under a table or behind the portaloos! My bike had been flipped around with the handlebars buried in the blackberry, hiding my distinctive bright green grips. Sneaky. It took me a while to find my bike - I walked right past it - but I wasn't worried, it was all part of the fun. Fun was all I was there for... the race was way ahead of me, probably already into the singletrack.

Me, extreeeeme right

The four lap course started by going up 8 Mile Gate Road and onto Sandy Skid Road, then into Pondy New, second half of Rollercoaster, down a fire road, into Old Chevy (skipping the first section) and then the option of a shortcut, or carry on to complete the course. The short cut (in fine SS tradition) required the rider drank a beer each time the shortcut was taken - up to three times/beers. On the fourth shortcut, the rider had to take the "food option", that being dry weetbix.

Me, on right, passing start/finish line

I rode, I stopped, I chatted, I rode, I laughed, I walked, I rode, I stopped, I tried to fix someone else's bike, I laughed, I rode, I chatted, I stopped, I drank beer, I fixed my brake, I rode, I laughed. That was just the first lap. Yeah, I had to fix my front brake... it was dragging pretty bad, no wonder I had so much trouble on the ride out to the race.

Another lap, with a happy beer buzz

Second lap, we went down Yellow Brick Road rather than riding on 8 Mile Gate Road. Second beer was just as refreshing as the first.

Third lap, very tired. I contemplated pulling out, but really didn't want to see those three horrible letters in the race results - DNF (did not finish). So I went out again. It was a super hard lap with no go left in my legs, and a tired head from the beer - admittedly, the beer made me feel only slightly foggier than I usually do in my oxygen-deprived state when riding. Third beer was a lovely reward. :D

Fourth lap? No way! The winners had finished their four laps in the time it took me to do two! There was no way I could get a fourth one in... besides there was a time cut-off in place because of the bad weather on the way. And it was getting dark.

My passenger Steve was still on the course. I had endeavoured to beat him. Afterall, he was dressed as Fred Dagg and riding a BMX! Lucky for me, I also beat the other freak bike - Jeff on his Jeffson 36er with 36" wheels.

Dinner at the Pig & Whistle after the race was fabulous. Prize giving was good fun too. Winners were applauded and 1st and 2nd losers were applauded a little too. The biggest and most rapturous applause went to Steve, for his efforts dressed as Fred Dagg, but most of all for coming DFL (dead f***ing last)!!!

As the other happy and delirious singlespeeders settled in for a night on the cans, Steve and I drove home. I got back in the door just after 9:30pm. Not bad. What a great day. :)

Coverage, photos, results and discussion can be found at Vorb.